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December 1998 Issue
Waste Not, Want Not
by Krafty
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Twelve things to do with used Christmas wrapping paper
  1. decoupage a coffee table
  2. roll and plait it into coasters and table mats
  3. line waste bins
  4. line drawers
  5. decoupage a mirror
  6. make paper chains
  7. fold it and wrap it round the Christmas cake
  8. make bows for the tree
  9. decoupage a picture frame
  10. wrap the base of the tree
  11. make cards for next year
  12. iron it and wrap next year's presents

Twelve things to do with boxes the gifts come in

  1. give to the hamster/gerbil for bedding
  2. use as a waste bin
  3. store big things
  4. store small things
  5. spray paint and use as pencil/paper clip/rubber band holders
  6. decoupage and give away as a gift
  7. glue several of the same size together and use for stationery
  8. spray paint and varnish and use as a plant pot holder
  9. leave around for the cat to enjoy
  10. keep, just in case
  11. recycle
  12. cover with wrapping paper for next year's gifts

Twelve things to do with an unwanted gift

  1. Complain and return/feel bad/ feel guilty
  2. Keep to put out/wear when they come to visit
  3. Dye/paint/modify
  4. Take back for a refund/the proper size/a nicer colour
  5. Put on your next craft stall
  6. Donate as a raffle prize
  7. Display/wear anyway
  8. Give to a charity
  9. Use as a conversation piece at a dinner party
  10. Use as a focus for meditation
  11. Ask everyone what it is
  12. Give to someone else next year

Twelve things to do with the thing you have to throw out to make room

  1. Give to charity/local hospital
  2. Dye/spray paint/modify and go to 1
  3. Sell through a local ad
  4. Sell through a national ad
  5. Sell through the Internet
  6. Have a bonfire
  7. Recycle
  8. Take to the local tip (sorry, refuse amenity)
  9. Offer to all your relatives
  10. Offer to all your friends
  11. Offer to all your neighbours
  12. Give away next year as an antique

Twelve ways to say "Thank You"

  1. Write a note
  2. Say nothing, just smile
  3. Hug
  4. Take out an ad in the local paper
  5. Buy dinner
  6. Cry
  7. Nip out and buy something for them
  8. Scream
  9. Show everyone what you got
  10. Kiss
  11. Refuse to put it down
  12. Use your imagination

Twelve ways to make sure they remember you next year

  1. Say "Thank you" this year
  2. Send a Christmas card early saying their gift is on order and you hope it arrives in time
  3. Spend all year telling them how much you like this year's gift
  4. Break something of yours in front of them
  5. Share with them your joy of looking through catalogues
  6. Serve a meal on mis-matched crockery
  7. Admire something of theirs
  8. Borrow something of theirs
  9. Borrow it again
  10. Hint - LOUDLY and often
  11. Talk about Christmas a lot, starting in August
  12. Buy them something this year


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