When faced with such a challenge, the first rule is simple: Be flexible! You may have particular ideas about menus, venues and such, but when your loved ones need special consideration, you can save yourself a lot of frustration by making that your priority and letting everything else fall in place behind it. In my case, I had gluten, dairy and soy allergies to consider and because I made making our meal and dessert choices cater to those, figuring things out became a matter of figuring out which options would work and then choosing from them.